


By Your Side Till The End

by AnnaSilverston



Series: Marvel Relationships [2]
Category: Winter Soldier (Comics)
Genre: Bucky is a sweetheart, Bucky will help you, Comforting Bucky, Confessing love, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Freaking Crossbones, Hurt/Comfort, Nightmares, Non-Graphic Rape/Non-Con, Past Torture, Psychologist!Reader, Torture, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-29
Updated: 2015-03-29
Packaged: 2018-03-20 05:47:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,034
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3639054
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnnaSilverston/pseuds/AnnaSilverston
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You had comforted him, guided him through his darkness, opened a door to his bright new future and stuck with him even when all he had done is hurting you. But when you got into trouble, it's his turn to repay.</p>
            </blockquote>





	By Your Side Till The End

You sprung up from your bed when you heard Bucky’s scream from the next room. You dashed out of the hallway and kicked the door open, seeing Bucky thrashed about on his bed. You hurriedly wrapped your arms around him, holding his head close to your chest while whispering sweet nothings in his ear. Despite Bucky’s kicking and punching, you stayed in place and held him as tight as you could, even though you started to feel numb from all the bruises that were forming on your body. It wasn’t the first time of you comforting Bucky at night since the day Steve found him. Steve would have been here, but you being the good friend you are, you offered to stay with him and help Bucky since you were a psychologist.  
Whenever he had a nightmare, you would hold him tight, telling him that everything will be fine and reminded him of his past with pre-serum Steve, and how he was such a playboy back then. You would constantly wake up with bruises though, but you didn’t mind as long as Bucky was fine. You couldn’t deny that you have a crush on the ex-assassin, hence all the time you spent with him. You knew that loving him would be hard and you were putting yourself in dangers, but you didn’t mind as long as Bucky was safe in your arms.  
Returning to you and Bucky, this nightmare was so far the worst he had ever had. You were starting to choke up a little blood but you still caressed his hair and telling him all the good things until he sprung up and grabbed you by the neck, throwing you hard to the wall with his metal arm. You flew back, creating a hole in the wall and fell down with a loud ‘CRUSH!’ You yelped and laid face down on the floor still, feeling your broken back and blood starting to pour out a little.  
Steve, who just heard the noise, immediately rushed to Bucky’s room and stared in shock at Bucky who had a cold glare on his face, breathing hard and looked at both him and you as if he didn’t know you at all. Steve grabbed the sides of Bucky’s face and gave him a shook.  
“Snap out of it, Buck! Your name is James Buchanan Barnes, and your best friends are Steve Rogers and Y/N L/N. I’m with you till the end of the line, remember?” Steve desperately said, releasing Bucky as he saw a light flashed in his icy blue eyes. Bucky shook his head and stared at Steve, and then at you, who were still laying on the floor with the relieving smile on your face. He gasped in horror and pushed Steve aside then rushed to you, picking you up bridal style as he told Steve to get Natasha.  
“Shh…Bucky, you’re back…” You whispered tiredly, your eyes about to close but quickly fluttered open when you felt Bucky pressing his face on your bruised neck. “I’m sorry, Y/N. I-I shouldn’t have done it… I don’t deserve your help, Y/N.” He murmured in your ear. You chuckled and using what strength you had left, you held up your hand and stroke his messy hair softly, saying that he shouldn’t apologize and that you would be fine.  
“C’mon guys, Natasha is here with her car!” Steve interrupted you and Bucky’s moment and helped Bucky to get you to the car. Once you’re safely tucked in, Steve turned his head to Bucky and looked at him uneasily. “I…I think you should stay home, Buck. I’m not sur-“ Bucky quickly cut him in the middle of his sentence. “It’s okay, I really don’t think that’s a good idea either.” Bucky said and walked back to the house while silently praying that you will get well soon.  
\--------------------------Three weeks later--------------------  
“Bucky! I’m home!” You happily shouted while walking slowly to the living room, Steve and Natasha carrying your stuff behind. There was no answer to your announcement however, leaving you worried about Bucky. “I swear he was here in the morning…” Steve said nervously, sensing something not right. Your eyes darted to a small note on the table and you picked it up, hoping silently in your mind for good news.  
“I have to leave this house. Please don’t try and find me. I will be fine now knowing that you and Y/N are safe. ‘Cause you aren’t while I’m around. I hope you get well soon, Y/N. Wish you the best.  
Bucky.”  
“No, Bucky….” You whispered and felt the tears running down freely on your cheeks. Steve and Natasha soon noticed and read the note too, shocked expression on their faces. “We have to find Bucky, guys! There’s no time to waste!” You said hurriedly and tried to run outside but Steve quickly stopped you, turning you around to face him.  
“Look, Y/N. Me and Natasha will find Bucky. You stay here in case he returns, okay?” He looked in your eyes, calming you down for a little bit. He knew your affection towards the soldier and it must’ve been hard for you, coping with Bucky in his state. But he hoped that you and Bucky will have a happy ending in the end, because you two really deserve it. You nodded silently and stayed behind, watching Steve and Natasha left and a single tear rolled down your cheek.  
\------------------------------  
For few days you waited anxiously for the trio to return. There was no news or any ideas about what happened to them. Hopefully with Tony’s technology, Steve and Natasha will be able to track Bucky down. Tons of questions were running through your head about Bucky. Is he fine? Does he have any nightmares? How will he cope with it? Is he safe? Does he miss you? You wiped the tears that were threatening to fall out again and went to make dinner. But you stopped dead in track as you heard the familiar bell rang. You rushed excitingly to the door and opened it, and luckily you, the trio was standing there. All with a few bruises and scratches, dirt and dried blood on their clothes. Obviously Bucky had fought back Steve and Natasha, but all that mattered was that they’re all here now, and words couldn’t describe your happiness. You grabbed the first aid kit when the three made themselves comfortable on the couch, Bucky in the middle with Steve and Natasha by his sides in case he tried to run.  
You quickly cleaned and bandaged them up, then made three chicken sandwiches. Steve moaned happily at the sight of his favorite snack and ate them up in a minute, Natasha smiled gracefully and thanked you while Bucky sat there silently, didn’t touch at the plate at all.  
“Bucky? You need to eat, honey. Or else you’ll be starved!” You said worriedly and brought the plate to his mouth, another hand on his metal shoulder and patting it slightly. “Y/N, can I talk to you in private?” Bucky requested nervously. Steve and Natasha looked at each other and left the room without a word. You nodded and sat down by his side, placing the plate on his thighs.  
“What’s wrong, Bucky?” You asked. “…Why do you stay with me, after all I’ve done to you?” Bucky said silently. You frowned and grabbed his shoulders, turning him to face you. “Buck, don’t you dare say that you don’t deserve my help again. You’re amazing, sweet and the best man I’ve ever met in the entire world…Beside Steve, that’s it.” You chuckled and continued. “If there’s anyone that deserves me, it’s you. I love you, James Buchanan Barnes…And I will stick with you till the end.” You blushed a little and turned away, afraid to meet his eyes if you got rejected. Bucky said nothing. The awkward silence stayed between you two for a while before Bucky stood up, knocking the plate down and yelled at you angrily.  
“You idiot! Do you not know who I used to be? I could kill you effortlessly anytime! You are risking yourself in danger, you fool! Can you not understand that?!” Bucky shouted at you, red veins tinted in his eyes. You stared up at him and stood up, cupping his face in your hands and smiled. “Who you used to be, Bucky. It is a risk that I’ll willingly take, as long as you’re by my side…and in my arms, Buck. I love you.” You leaned in for a quick peck but Bucky had his hand on your hair and pressed you closer to him, deepening the kiss. You stood there still cupping his cheeks while he kissed you full of passion, with a hint of hunger. He licked your lips and you opened it, granted him the entrance. His tongue explored all around the sweet taste of the new territory and yours too. Bucky quickly moved down to your jawline and then your neck, attacking it with kisses. You gasped and clutched at his messy hair when he got to a certain place. You felt him smirked as he bit and sucked on the spot, turning it purple and blue, marking you as his. He pulled away leaving you breathless and stared in your beautiful e/c orbs.  
“You have just sealed the deal with the devil, honey.”  
It’s been a few months since the day you confessed to him. You couldn’t have asked for a better boyfriend. You and Bucky took care of each other and his nightmare has gotten much better. He didn’t attack you anymore and you two would cuddle until you fell asleep. But the happiness didn’t last long for you and Bucky.  
You were out for groceries with Natasha. Bucky tried to go with you but Steve insisted on spending time “catching up with the century” with Bucky so he had no other choice but to stay. “Remember to stay safe, Y/N.” He had said and kissed you on the forehead lovingly.  
Natasha was in another aisle while you were picking out the ice cream tubes when suddenly a pair of strong hands grabbed you and pulled you to the “Staff Only” closet nearby. The intruder pressed a cloth to your nose and you held your breath in, but you could only stay like that for a certain amount of time and your body gave in, soon passing out in the stranger’s arms.  
\-------------------------------------  
“Steve! Bucky!” Natasha shouted and dashed into the living room, scaring the men who were watching the TV. “HYDRA got Y/N!” The news quickly got Bucky and he sprung up from his seat, growling at Natasha. “I told you to take care of her!” He yelled. “I was, I swear! I just turned away for a minute-“ Steve pushed the two of them apart and quickly rushed to his room for the shield while Natasha and Bucky ran out for the car. After three days, with Tony’s help, they had finally tracked your current location.  
An old warehouse god knows where. The destination had no name and there were no people living here. Worst of all, it took a day to drive there.  
Meanwhile the three were tracking for you, you were tied up in the chair and being tortured by a stranger in a skull mask wearing some sort of sleeveless vest with two bones crossing on it. You were tortured, hurt and starved. When you would pass out of hunger and dehydration, the stranger would electrocute you, feeding you some bread and water before continue with the torture. When you saw the kidnapper walked into the room again, you spat him. He only stopped and growled out his name: “Crossbones”  
“Since HYDRA had been destroyed, I suppose there’s nothing wrong with me torturing you, little China doll.” He grabbed the hem of his mask and pulled it up, revealing his horrific burnt face. But you still noticed him nonetheless, you had seen him in the hospital before while visiting Steve.  
“Brock Rumlow…” You murmured, staring at him in disbelief. Rumlow chuckled and walked closer to you, tearing what is left of your dirty and blood-covered blouse apart and threw them away before he grabbed your chin aggressively, forcing you to stare at his disgusting face.  
“Since your Soldier wouldn’t turn up for the sweet little revenge, I suppose he should settle down on hearing it.” He gave you a cocky smirk before pulling out the phone from his pants pocket and dialing a number and turned on the speaker.  
“Hello, Soldier. I believe I have exciting news for you.”  
“Who the hell are you?”  
“Relax. I used to be your colleague Crossbones.”  
“I don’t know any Crossbones. I’m turning this bullshit off. Good day.”  
“Hold on. The name is Brock Rumlow, does that ring a bell?”  
“…Rumlow you bastard. You got Y/N, didn’t you?”  
“Ah yes, you got that right. Your little treasure is here with me now, but since you won’t turn up for the marvelous performance, I suppose I should deliver it to you through the phone. So hang on there.” Rumlow smirked and placed the phone on the table beside you. He untied you and you tried to run away, but he pushed you down on the ground and pinned your arms up painfully. You only let out a wince. You heard Bucky shouting your name on the phone but it was quickly blocked by the sound of clothes removing. You looked down and see that you had only your undergarments on. A look of horrifying shock on your face as you realized what he was about to do. Rumlow smirked and tore your panties away, leaving you exposed in front of his eye. He unzipped his pants and plunged himself into you with one hard thrust, breaking your hymen. You screamed in both pain and shame while he kept thrusting in you, bringing out even more screaming for Bucky to hear on the other line  
Bucky was like sitting on fire, he had no idea what was happening to you. He rushed Natasha to drive faster while he was forced to listen to your painful screams.  
“No! Stop it please!” He heard you plead.  
“Ahh..Now why should I do so? I am enjoying myself, taking you forcefully like this, leaving you broken and thrashing under me is a satisfying scene, little Y/N.” Bucky felt his fist turned white from and he gritted his teeth.  
“You just lost your fucking chance at living, you fucker!” He shouted to the phone. “But at least I’m full-filling my needs before I die, Soldier. With you living by her side, I was surprised at her still having her virginity.” Bucky threw the phone outside of the window and shut his eyes tight. Steve and Natasha also growled at what they just have heard. If only they could arrive there faster…  
Meanwhile after Rumlow was done with you, he left you in the room alone. You just put on your torn panties, which was luckily not that revealing and your torn shirt. You sat there for what seems like an hour and hung your head in shame while tears streaming down freely. You sobbed and hugged yourself close, wishing that you could just die now. But unlucky for you, Rumlow soon returned and forced you to another room, where you saw a strange looking machine. He made you sat on the chair and it quickly cuffed you, leaving you scared and confused at what was about to happen. He only smirked and you felt two strange device connecting to your head painfully.  
“NO!” You screamed out in pain as you felt everything slowly fade away. You keep screaming for what seems like eternity. You just wished you die right now so the pain will end. You screamed until you throat burnt and when it finally stopped you laid there emotionlessly and not moving a muscle.  
Rumlow was settled on looking at you for a while when Bucky busted in the room with Natasha and Steve following right after. He punched Rumlow hard, once, twice and tons of times with his metal arm until he couldn’t make out his face anymore. He growled and Natasha shot Rumlow in the stomach once, finishing him.  
“Hail HYDRA…” was his last words. But no, Bucky wasn’t done with him yet, he grabbed a knife nearby and began skinning him mercilessly, chopping him in parts and throwing the mess aside when he was done. But boy, he was too caught up in revenge and forgot about you. When he turned to you all bloody and messed up, he saw you looking at Steve and him strangely with absolutely no emotion in your eyes. He felt his guts wrenched as he saw you broken and wounded. All he wanted to do was to get you out of here and run away till the rest of your life.  
“The bastard wiped her…” Natasha said, not looking at Bucky while Steve was trying hard to make you remember. Bucky rushed by your side and grabbed your hand delicately. You only looked to him and said the horror sentence: “Who are you?”  
“Y/N…please remember! I’m Bucky, we were in love, remember? You said you would stay by my side till the end, please, I haven’t told you I love you yet…Please remember!” He pleaded as a single tear rolled down his cheek. You looked at him and then at your hand which was still in his. “Bucky…Y/n...Love…By your side till the end….” You whispered and grabbed his hand tighter. Bucky smiled in happiness as you squeezed his hand. “Promise you’ll make me…remember? I feel…empty…” You said, looking deep into his crystal blue eyes.  
“I promise I’ll make you remember, Y/n…For now let’s just get out of this hellhole.” Bucky chuckled and picked you up bridal style. He will make you remember, he will be patient with you as you had done to him. It’s time for him to repay you.


End file.
